No, this isn’t the post where you all learn I’m secretly a porn mogul. Sorry to disappoint. (And, Dad, sorry to scare.)
My title seemed to fit since I’m only passingly familiar with the Male Penis
(Male Penis? Is there another kind? Ok, let’s just go with Penis) in the way that most heterosexual women are. Furthermore, although I’m obviously vehemently against the mutilation of the infant penis through circumcision, I’ve never actually seen a Natural Penis* in the Wild. The primary** Penis in my life, while Unnatural in that the foreskin was removed, is luckily owned by a man who is equally against non-consenting genital mutilation.
Suddenly I find myself the proud in loco parentis of not one but TWO Natural Penises! Oh no! Where’s the manual for that!?!
Never fear! Super Librarian is here! I have done extensive research in how to care for my new wards until that time when the boys can take over the care of their own Penises. And, I’m going to share all the bounty of knowledge with you, dear reader.
Step #1: Don’t touch it.
Step #2: Seriously, leave it alone.
Step #3: Repeat step 1.
“But what about-“
NO, really, don’t touch it. There is nothing you need to do. Do you worry about cleaning inside your daughters’ vaginas***? Of course not. It is considered both internal and self cleaning. The same with the foreskin.
Often, the limited (if any) exposure we have of an uncircumcised penis is of the adult natural penis where the prepuce organ (called the foreskin in men and the clitoral hood in women) moves freely up and down the shaft of the penis. Furthermore, our exposure to infant penises is of a circumcised penis where the glans (head) is exposed. Both of these lead to what is frankly the abuse and misuse of the natural infant penis.
According to Dr. Momma’s site one of the causes of penile complications (second only to circumcision) is “well-meaning adults who retract, over-clean, and ‘mess with’ intact boys’ foreskins before they retract naturally and completely on their own.” So, here’s what you need to know:
- The foreskin retracts on its own time table without any help from anyone other than its owner. The average age of retraction is 10.6 years. Yes, years. It is completely normal for your son’s foreskin to remain tightly adhered to the glans well past infancy. This is important for you to know because…
- You doctors, parents, friends, and local mailman will tell you that you “need” to manually retract your son’s penis. But…
- There is no need ever to
- manually force the foreskin back or “loosen” it up.
- clean inside, under, or around the foreskin. You clean it like you would your finger. That is all. Really.
- allow a doctor to “check” the glans. Is he going to check a girl’s cervix? Have this discussion BEFORE your doctor removes your son’s diaper. Retraction takes only seconds so be vigilant. I told every doc and nurse around before Boston’s surgery and they had no reason to mess with his penis.
There are a few other interesting things that can occur in your intact sons. Unfortunately, this generation of dads has no first hand experience so it is up to you, the parent, to educate yourself. Do not assume your doctor knows best in this arena. Here are some sites for more information.
* I prefer to use the term natural because that is what we use for other body parts like “natural breasts” natural nose, etc.
** I mean only
*** if so, heaven forbid, please seek help