My Reverse Traditional Husband In The Wild!

Welcome to the February Carnival of Natural Parenting: Love and partners!
This post was written for inclusion in the monthly Carnival of Natural Parenting hosted by Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama. This month we’re writing about how a co-parent has or has not supported us in our dedication to natural parenting. Please read to the end to find a list of links to the other carnival participants.
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This month’s Carnival of Natural Parenting asked me how my co-parent supports my natural parenting choices.  What a great topic!  I can without hesitation say my husband is an essential part of our parenting team.  He doesn’t just support it he is the core of it.

My family is called “reverse traditional.”  Traditional meaning that we are a one income family and reverse meaning that Mommy is that one income.  I’ve talked before about my journey to this spot.  I don’t really like the term reverse traditional since I think it assumes there is anything traditional these days.  I don’t like Breadwinning Mom either.  I couldn’t do what I do without Pete’s “job” being done at home.  He is winning bread as much as I am.  Mr. Mom is offensive to most, although the fact that the movie by that name was even created is a step forward in my opinion.  Exposure equals normalizing.  The more reverse traditional dads we see the better!

So, what does a reverse traditional Dad look like?  Want to go on a safari?  Let’s travel into the wilds to view some of the most elusive fathers in the world!

The Emperor Penguin Dad spends up to two months without eating while keeping his unhatched babies warm.  Once hatched, this superstar dad feeds the babies with a milky white substance produced by a gland in his esophagus (also note the “takes a village” technique of all the males huddling together to help keep the babies warm).

Sea Horse Dads are the only males on earth that gestate and give birth to their children (200 hundred of them).  They even go through painful labor.

The Red Fox Dad could win the awards for father and mate of the year.  He lets mom have her babymoon for 3 months while he provides food and protection for her and her pups.  Once mom is on her feet again he continues to father his pups.  He even homeschools!  He teaches his pups how to forage for food by burying scraps in the ground, thus giving them skills necessary for their survival.  (In a telling coincidence when I searched for “red fox father and pup” in a google image search, Google said “did you mean red fox mother and pup?”)

The Midwife Toad Dad carries his incubating eggs around on his legs until they are ready to hatch.  The Darwin Frog carries them in his vocal sac through the tadpole stage.

Daddy Flamingo helps mom build the nest and shares in incubating the eggs.  Both mom and dad can feed the hatchlings a milk-like substance.

Ostrich Dads not only incubate the eggs but parent them with continued protection and homeschool them in survival skills.
The Dyak Fruit Bat Dad is the only male mammal known to lactate and nurse its young (although domesticated goats sometimes do too).
The Human Dad is known to serve as a locomotion device for pre-ambulatory young.
Human Dad forms strong nurturing bonds with their young.
Human Dad does what is called “sleep sharing” or “co-sleeping” with the young.
Human Dad is naturally a playful animal and often can be found playing with his young.
Human Dad feeds his young and teaches societal norms like “table manners.”
The human species often uses mechanical means of locomotion.  Here Human Dad can be seen teaching his young to operate a mechanical locomotion device.

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Carnival of Natural Parenting -- Hobo Mama and Code Name: MamaVisit Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama to find out how you can participate in the next Carnival of Natural Parenting!
Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:
(This list will be updated Feb. 9 with all the carnival links, and all links should be active by noon EST. Go to Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama for the most recently updated list.)


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33 thoughts on “My Reverse Traditional Husband In The Wild!

  1. My husband would love to SAHD. Although he is the one with the master’s degree & had the better paying job at the time when we were making our decision. I think it is awesome that your hubby is such a rockstar dad :)

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  2. Like @Kim, my husband is the cash earner in our house, though I know he’d love to be a SAHD, too. I’ve always promised him the opportunity once I’m done having babies and can get a decent paycheck rolling in. Hopefully our kids will still be young enough to warrant it – I doubt teenagers would appreciate a fulltime stay at home dad hahaha. But who knows, maybe they would. Dad would certainly help them with their science projects!

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  3. My husband is DYING to be a stay at home dad! I wish he could, but for now we need both incomes.

    I think you need to turn those photos into a kid’s book- very sweet!

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  4. I’m a SAHM, but I like to say that we participate in role reversal. My husband works outside of the home as a way to be a support me and our family, as opposed to me staying home as a way to support him, as was “traditional” back in the 40s and 50s.

    As a biologist, I just wanted to point out that seahorses are actually not mammals. (insert nerdy little duck).

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  5. This post is so creative – I love learning about all of the different animal dads! Those seahorses were smart cookies ;)

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  6. I love this post, and the safari. So educational! :)

    It is my fervent hope that we see more families where fathers stay home with their kids. Or, for that matter, take on more of the kid-related responsibilities. I really think that everyone would benefit in so many ways by breaking down stereotypical gender roles.

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  7. Love your post! Both of your carnival posts have been super interesting and taken a great spin on the theme. I really look forward to more.

    And yay! for at home dads – that is really something special for your kids!!

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  8. Love your post! Both of your carnival posts have been super interesting and taken a great spin on the theme. I really look forward to more.And yay! for at home dads – that is really something special for your kids!!

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  9. This is a wonderful post. You added such a creative spin on a topic that very clearly illuminates how wonderfully your husband fulfills the many aspects of parenthood/fatherhood in the wild and not so wild. Children benefit from quality intimate time with both of their parents and I think that often fathers forget just how essential they are to the balance. Your husband is clearly maximizing his loving energy. How beautiful to read about and see the connection in photos.

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  10. Wonderful post! I was a SAHM and now I’m a working grandmother. I have friends and co-workers that have to worry about their grandchildren and ones that even take over parenting them. I am proud to say that I never worry about Aellyn because I know she is so loved and well taken care of. Thank you and SAHD for being such loving parents. I’m glad I can just be Grandma.

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  11. What a wonderful post! I really enjoy reading all of your posts and really want to learn more on natural parenting for Violet, as well as for our next child. :)

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  12. This is really cute. My whole family enjoyed it, especially my little Hazelnut (4.5) who gleaned “the moral of the story is that human daddies and flamingo daddies are the best ones in the animal kingdom. That’s why we should never eat flamingos.”

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  13. SO hilarious! I love this. Especially the mechanical locomotion device! Sam and Mikko spend so much time just goofing around in the car, it cracks me up. Mikko could push the radio buttons and turn on the wipers all day, and Sam is totally patient about it.

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  14. Great post and our family structure is similar to yours. I’ll have to read your story.

    Dads are so important and it stabs me in the heart when they are devalued in TV shows and by other women.

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  15. That was a totally fascinating and wonderfully thought out post. I’ve learnt a lot coming here tonight, and seen some beautiful photographs of your family also.

    CJ xx

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  16. I wish more males who are the “breadwinner” understood what you do regarding the job of staying home with children. It took my husband watching Peanut by himself to truly understand how much work it is to stay at home.

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  17. I wish more males who are the "breadwinner" understood what you do regarding the job of staying home with children. It took my husband watching Peanut by himself to truly understand how much work it is to stay at home.

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  18. So great learning about all the dads in the animal kingdom. I’ve never heard of ‘reverse traditional’ either. But regardless of who does what, you are both supporting the kind of parents you want to be and the kind of lifestyle you want to have.

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